The following is an ancient Chinese parable that is believed to have roots in Taoism.
There was once a farmer in ancient China who owned a horse. “You are so lucky!” his neighbors told him, “to have a horse to pull the cart for you.” “Maybe,” the farmer replied.
One day he didn’t latch the gate properly and the horse ran away. “Oh no! That is terrible news!” his neighbors cried. “Such bad luck!” “Maybe,” the farmer replied.
A few days later the horse returned, bringing with it six wild horses. “How fantastic! You are so lucky,” his neighbors told him. “Maybe,” the farmer replied.
The following week the farmer’s son was breaking-in one of the wild horses when it threw him to the ground, breaking his leg. “Oh no!” the neighbors cried. “Such bad luck, all over again!” “Maybe,” the farmer replied.
The next day soldiers came and took away all the young men to fight in a bloody war that the family did not support. The farmer’s son was left behind. “You are so lucky!” his neighbors cried. “Maybe,” the farmer replied.
Explanation:
This parable is about the importance of not engaging in automatic judgments. We cannot know what the long term consequences of an event will be. Similarly, we cannot control much of what happens in our lives and in the world. However, we can control how we think about things and our reactions. If we automatically jump to seeing everything as completely bad we will always be anxious or depressed. If, on the other hand, we have a strong tendency to only see things in a positive light, we may be unprepared for the dangers or misfortune we may face. It is healthier to accept that which is outside of our control (e.g., the past, natural events), or mostly outside of our control (the future, what others think of us, events in the world), and to not to jump to conclusions about events. Rather, it benefits us to focus on that which we can control, or that which we have a high degree of control over (the way we think, what we believe, and how we act).